Giving birth is one of the most incredible acts a human body can perform, as well as one of the most strenuous. After a hormonal, physically traumatic experience, it’s not uncommon for birth givers to not want intimacy afterwards. On top of the physical effects to the body and the emotional drain of birth, intimacy can be a difficult activity to prioritize with a new-born to tend to which sometimes involves breastfeeding, which is additionally physically draining.
As you navigate postpartum intimacy, you may want to keep the following tips in mind:
Be Patient
Generally, it takes six weeks from birth to be fully healed in and around the vulva and vagina, though this timeline varies from person to person. Engaging in penetrative intimate acts is generally not advisable before fully healing. That being said, each individual should prioritize the advice from their healthcare professional.
Connect on an Emotional Level
It’s possible that intimacy won’t feel as good or desirable immediately after birth as it did before birth but that doesn’t mean it will stay that way forever. Intimacy can look many ways and doesn’t necessarily need to have a sexual connotation. Cuddling, giving each other massages, and even emotional conversations can foster a feeling of intimacy.
Stay in your Comfort Zone
Physical intimacy and sex should happen on the mother's terms, not how you feel you “should” practice it. Length and timing of intimacy, type of intimacy, or any other factor should function to make you feel connected and comfortable. Intimacy and sex don’t need to be long, drawn out sessions if that doesn’t sound good. Quickies are your friend!
Everyone’s postpartum intimacy journey is a deeply personal experience but keeping these tips in mind will help you make the most out of the new relationship a couple enters after childbirth!
